Book Review

Enemies in Love: A German POW, a Black Nurse, and an Unlikely Romance

By Alexis Clark

Book Review by Susan Graham

Enemies in Love, published by The New Press, is hardly a typical romance novel. It’s the story of Elinor Powell, an Army nurse and Frederick Albert, a German prisoner of war in the 1940s. The first part reads like an academic book and the second half you might think is fiction, but it is very real.

The first surprise is that German POWs were held in camps in remote desert areas of Arizona. The second one is that Black nurses were shunned and made to take care of them. Elinor Powell was one such nurse. This unknown story is a shocking bit of World War II history told in great detail by Alexis Clark.

Elinor Powell and Frederick Albert fell in love and risked being found together in the Jim Crow era. They decided that one way to be together after the war was for Elinor to get pregnant, necessitating Frederick to come back to the states after his release in Germany.

The couple had two biracial sons and this is where the story took a dive for me. The family never spoke about race or identity. Yes, this was the 1950s, but racial issues were talked about, especially in interracial families. The author mistakenly uses biracial, interracial, mixed-race and other terminology in a jumble of stories about the children’s childhood, which is based mostly on the memories of one of the sons. Children’s memories are not always accurate and we have no way of knowing what the truth really is. The family moved a great deal, which can have detrimental effects on children, but their problems seem to mostly be attributed to the fact that they were biracial. Also, there were problems in the marriage, with racial acceptance, with Frederick’s mother and father, and a host of other unfortunate circumstances, yet everything seemed to center on race. They were humans and had other issues, as everyone does.

Enemies in Love is a very worthwhile read and the historical events are fascinating. I recommend it, keeping in mind that times have changed, thank goodness, for interracial families in America.


Real American: A Memoir BOOK REVIEW

Book Review by Susan Graham

Real American: A Memoir

Real American

I read a review of Real American: A Memoir by Julie Lythcott-Haims in The New York Times yesterday. It said Julie Lythcott-Haims’ new memoir is about growing up biracial. It’s not. It’s about growing up black.

If you want to get really angry, read this book. In fact, it should be required reading for anyone even thinking about being in an interracial relationship and especially parents of multiracial children. In so many ways, it’s a primer on what not to do. To me, as the mother of multiracial children—now adults—it is reassuring that I raised them to embrace their entire heritage.

Lythcott-Haims claims early in the book that her parents had entered into some type of “interracial child experiment that was failing.” Experiment? Would people actually do that? Throughout the book, the author lashes out at her parents—mostly her mother—for any number of ways they let her down and made her identify as black, but in other places, she is proud of her black identity. It’s confusing.

What is very clear is that this biracial woman felt she had to make a choice. She is crazy angry at everyone and everything, yet she doesn’t get that she could have embraced all of her incredibly stunning heritage and, perhaps, celebrated that. No, being biracial is not just a way to acknowledge her white mother, as she says; it is a way of acknowledging herself. She just couldn’t get there.

It angers me that this author didn’t do her homework. She glosses over the entire multiracial movement with an offhand comment about the Census Bureau making “new terms” in the 1990s, as if it was their idea and not that of the many parents who led the action to get the government to even consider counting people as more than one race. We were everywhere and I find it amazing that an interracial family would have been hiding under a rock big enough to miss it entirely.

The author is completely preoccupied with the color of her children, who she refers to as “quadroon children,” “Black,” and “mulatto.” To her, they are more colors than people, which I just don’t understand. That she is angry at the plight of black people in America and all over the world, is obvious—I’m just as angry about it! She would say that wasn’t possible because I’m not black. Not true. Black lives matter to me, too. Multiracial lives matter to me, as well.

Much of what Lythcott-Haims is trying to say is that what matters is how other people see you. If they see you as black, you are black. As my son told congress, it is how he sees himself that matters. Does he know other people see him as black? Absolutely. Interracial families are not blind and stupid. We teach our children about all of their cultures and how people might look at them and classify them on their personal color scale. We get it; we live it, too.

The one thing the author and I agree on is that racism will never go away and that is why everyone needs to read about those of us who have been through it. You’ll have to read about both sides, search your heart, make your own decisions, and neither the author nor I can make it for you. I respect that you may choose for your children to identify as only one race. I just wish more people would respect that they may choose to be multiracial.



New People – Book Review

Book Review

New People by Danzy Senna

New People

New People is about a multiracial woman named Maria. These are some of the terms she uses for multiracial people:

Miscellaneous People

Mulatto (her favorite word, which means little mule) and Mulatta



The “N” Word

Odd, twisted girls

Racially nebulous



Born again black people


Mestizo Abandoner


“Everything” and

my least favorite, “Mutt.”

She also says things like, “Being black and looking white was enough of a freak show” and “He was embracing his black identity.” Apparently, biracial people can absolutely not embrace their white identity. So passing for black is fine; passing for white is not.


It’s as if the author, Danzy Senna, had plugged biracial into every thesaurus she could find and then used the words over and over ad nauseam. Maria measures everything and everyone by race and wouldn’t you know she is engaged to a biracial man, but falls for a black poet. I suppose that’s the premise of the book. By the way, the term New People was not invented by Senna. It was also a magazine that was started in the 1980s by Yvette Walker-Hollis.


I realize that a lot of readers think this book is quite funny. A review in Essence magazine thinks it’s hysterical. There is that. I also watched a new “comedy” on Netflix last week with a biracial character. Many “jokes” were made at his expense because he was biracial. His mother repeats several times that she hopes for “butterscotch babies.” Why is it suddenly OK to make jokes about the multiracial community?


When I read fiction, I ask myself about a quarter into the book if I care about the characters. In New People, I knew by page 14 that I didn’t care what happened to these people. I re-check half way through and with this book, things only got worse. Other reviewers of Danzy Senna’s works do not share my opinion. She and her book are being heavily promoted and praised. She is clearly the biracial darling of the moment. I read most books about multiracial people because of my work with Project RACE and the multiracial community. I can honestly say no person I have ever met—multiracial or otherwise—is preoccupied 100 percent of the time with race, like Maria. They are usually the people who scream, “There is no such thing as race because it’s a social construct,” but they are the same people who give you an entire host of words about the multiracial community. You may want to think about that for a moment.


To be fair, if you are looking for a book that presents an entire population as screwed up, also with no scientific basis, New People should fit into your life perfectly.


Susan Graham


Ten Reasons

Ten Reasons Why White Mothers Can Raise Multiracial Children:

by Susan Graham

Ryan and me

  1. We conceived or adopted our children and we knew exactly what we were doing.
  1. We are fully capable of raising our children as equals with their other monoracial or multiracial siblings.
  1. We do not have to be the same color as our child to give them the history and knowledge of their other ancestry or ancestries.
  1. We know how to say, “No thank you; my child does not need you to tell her what she is.”
  1. We know and respect how President Obama chose to self-identify (as black). He could have identified as multiracial, but that wasn’t his Do not “Barack Obama” my multiracial children.
  1. We can say without laughing, “Yes, I’m the mom. Want to set up a play date for our kids?”
  1. We can say, “I learned how to do my child’s hair” or “I found it was easier to have someone else do my daughter’s hair.”
  1. We will stand up for our children’s right to be included on forms that require racial and ethnic identity.
  1. We fully understand the question, “What are they?” We can choose to answer any way we like and can explain one more time that the thing called the one-drop rule is not a law.
  1. We can happily live without you if you’ve programmed your family to be uncomfortable around our family.


BOOK REVIEW: The Kitchen House

written by Kathleen Grissom

Publisher: Touchstone

385 Pages
         Take everything you think you know about plantations in Virginia before the Civil War, slavery, color hierarchy, masters, mistresses, children, racial codes, and open your mind to a new and different story. Lavinia McCarten is seven-yearsold when she is orphaned during passage from Ireland making her way to America. Lavinia McCarten is white and becomes an indentured servant at the kitchen house of the grand tobacco plantation. She is to live with the other slaves, black and mulatto, under the watchful eyes of Belle—the illegitimate slave daughter of the master.
        Lavinia must spend her most formative years trying to make sense of liveand relationships between the Kitchen house and the very different kind of hierarchy in the Big house. Lives get sorted and sordid between the residents of both homes.
        Secrets unfold and discoveries are made. Growing into womanhood, Lavinia finds herself wanting to stay with her coloredfamily, but others have plans for to marry within her race as a white woman.
        The Kitchen House will surprise and shock; you will feel open, raemotions as well as the reserved and perhaps better contained survivareactions of all of the well-drawn characters in this finely-written story that will never quite leave you.
     – Reviewed by Susan Graham

THX! Another Incredible Multiracial Heritage Wk



Multiracial Heritage Week 2016 has been fantastic! Thanks so much to the following:


  • All of the volunteers across the country who helped make MHW16 such a success by contacting their governors.
  • The state lawmakers and their staffs for all the help with proclamations and resolutions.
  • The media for giving us local and national coverage.
  • Kelly Baldwin for all she does for multiracial children and interracial families.
  • Karson Baldwin, President of Project RACE Kids, who can always be counted on to do whatever is needed.
  • Our wonderful Project RACE Teens, especially Lexi Brock and Makensie McDaniel co-presidents and Dionna Roberson, VP.
  • Patti Barry, our Project RACE Grandparents President.
  • Filmmaker Tay Erikson for the best video ever!
  • The Project RACE Advisory Board for all your help and great advice.
  • The K&F Baxter Family Foundation for funding us for so many Multiracial Heritage Week efforts.
  • The anonymous donor, you know who you are, what you gave and how grateful we are.
  • All of our wonderful families who make it possible for us to do our work.
  • My son, Ryan, for always giving me good advice.
  • My husband, Sam; my pup, Sonny; and Kim Carlucci, all of whom took excellent care of me so I could thank all of you.


Podcast Guest


Multiracial Family Man


I had a great time being the guest on comic Alex Barnett’s popular podcast, “Multiracial Family Man.” Alex makes interviews informative and fun! You can listen to the interview by going the Multiracial Family Man website at “Latest Blog Posts.”

or on itunes at:

Hope you enjoy the show!

Susan Graham

White Privilege


The Thing about White Privilege

I saw this recently:

“I’m proud to be black,” said a black man.

“I’m proud to be Asian,” said an Asian man.

“I’m proud to be white,” said a racist.

So here’s the thing: I’m tired of the way people talk about white privilege as if we all grew up as Kennedys or Rockefellers. I know that “white privilege” means more than wealth, it means the ability to do things people of other races can’t do, but that’s not specific to bathrooms and drinking fountains anymore, so I’m not sure exactly what is.

I live in a community that is 70% Hispanic. I can’t communicate with people who only speak Spanish, as many do. When I walk into a store and am—or what looks to be—the only non-Hispanic person there (by Census definition), I don’t exactly feel at home. I have seen Hispanic women pull their children a little closer when I smile at them. Yeah, you need to consider this stuff when you’re white.

I also know that if I ever am on trial in my county, there will not be a jury of my racial peers and I will be a disadvantaged white woman. Yes, I know what it’s like to be the only one in the room. It happens every day. I have taken some criticism for many things in the multiracial movement, usually from the academic circle, but now they want to attack me for being a white woman? It sounds pretty racist to me. 

A new phenomenon is occurring between racial groups. It’s called “The Knockout Game,” and apparently is perpetrated by young minority groups who attack people on the street—mostly people who are white, older, and Jewish. I could qualify as a victim. It amounts to random acts of violence against a group to which I belong, carried out by another racial or ethnic group, most specifically young black males. It does not make white people sleep better at night if they have to go out in public the next day.

In discussions about white privilege, people tend to bring in what is known as “sense of entitlement.” It always reminds me of one of my father’s favorite sayings when we were kids: “You can stay here as long as you want, but when you leave, you leave with what you came with.” The implications were not to plan on ever moving back and don’t take any of Dad’s stuff with you. These mandates did not instill a “sense of entitlement” in my brothers and me. However, it did help us become four very self-reliant individuals.   

Unlike some of folks, I have lived in many different places and met very different people.

f you’re white does it automatically make you a racist? I know plenty of racists who aren’t white. It’s unacceptable no matter what race you are or what public pulpit you have.

I don’t understand why some very vocal people who claim to be in the multiracial community are attacking “privileged white women.”  While it’s true that my ancestors did not have hundreds of years of racial baggage in the United States, it’s also true that they were treated inhumanely in other parts of the world. I’m not responsible for what was done to your ancestors any more than you’re responsible for mine.

Also, you assume I am one hundred percent white. Is that because you’re scared that you and I might find out we’re related? What I do know is that I’ll have one of those popular DNA tests done one day and might discover some other racial or ethnic background in my genes. I might also find out some important medical information while I’m at it.

Yes, of course I understand that people who are not white are often made to feel lesser than whites; but I was never taught how to do that—so I don’t.

Do I notice people by the way they look? Sure, I do, and I bet you do too. However, that doesn’t mean I treat them as any more or less privileged than they treat me. Does the fact that I’m white mean that all my neighbors accept me, that my children were never discriminated against in schools, that I have never been asked to show my ID, or that I felt the clerk at a big box store today was helping me last?

Someone said that white privilege means you can walk the Earth unaware of your color. I don’t believe anyone can do that, yet we should all be able to.

There is also a misunderstanding about white people, that we can go wherever we want, whenever we’d like and do just about anything we want, and non-white people can’t. That’s just not true. I have been discriminated against because of my religion, where I live, the color of my skin and hair, my disabilities, my age, due to the fact that I’m a woman, and more. But I don’t feel that everyone who is black, Asian, Hindu, male,  able-bodied, and young discriminates against me. But if you do, I’m going hold you accountable, not a group that you belong to.    

I don’t like being a racial target any more than you do, so if you have a problem with me specifically, let me know; otherwise, you’re putting me in a group when you don’t want to be lumped into one yourself. Think about it.


Susan Graham




Federal Response

Below is a letter sent in response to a Federal Register entry. Your advocates at Project RACE read the Federal Register daily and respond when necessary for the multiracial community. 


December 20, 2013


Stephanie Valentine

Acting Director

Privacy and Information Collection Clearance Division

Privacy, Information and Records Management Services

Office of Management

United States Department of Education

400 Maryland Avenue, SW, LGJ Room 2E105

Washington, DC 20202-4573


Submitted through the Federal eRulemaking Portal


Re: Comments on Mandatory Civil Rights Data Collection

Docket ID Number ED-2013-ICCD-0079

Proposed 20113-14 Civil Rights Data Collection



Dear Acting Director Valentine:

Project RACE (Reclassify All Children Equally) respectfully submits the comments below regarding Civil Rights Data Collection. We are the national advocates for multiracial children, teens, adults, and our families. We were founded in 1990 to represent those of us who are affected by Washington, but are not a large lobbying entity. As a result, we are often rendered invisible in the discussions and planning for racial and ethnic classifications. Our national members and supporters are therefore concerned with the Mandatory Civil Rights Data Collection.

Our recommendation is very simple. The Office of Civil Rights (OCR) includes a classification of “Multicultural or Multiethnic or Multiracial” under “the major racial and ethnic groups states use for accountability and assessment data.” Yet the Department of Education (DOE) does not list “Multicultural or Multiethnic or Multiracial” in its racial and ethnic choices stated under “The general racial ethnic categories that most clearly reflect individuals’ recognition of their community or with which the individuals most identify.” Their list includes “Two or more races.”

First, there should be consistency between agencies. Second, the preferred terminology used most by the multiracial community is “multiracial.” We would alternatively be inclined to accept some form of the OCR’s “Multicultural, Multiethnic, or Multiracial.”

Many school districts have also adopted the following wording on their forms: “If your child is multiracial, you may select two or more races,” followed by the specific racial and ethnic list of categories in compliance with their state departments of education. This is the suggested wording provided by the multiracial community.

It is vitally important for students to be able to be included in civil rights categories and be equally protected under civil rights protections. It is time to recognize our multiracial students in our schools and give them the dignity of proper terminology as an important   part of their civil rights protection.



Susan Graham

Executive Director

Project RACE, Inc.




Multiracial Movement Suicide? Part 1

Sometimes I wonder if the academics ever get tired of taking pot-shots at me, but then I remember they have to “publish or perish” and I stop wondering for a little while. I had been putting off reading one of the latest, “’Founding Mothers:’ White Mothers of Biracial Children in the Multiracial Movement (1979-2000),” a thesis by Alicia Doo Castagno. It’s all over the Internet, just google the author.
I agreed to two telephone interviews for this thesis. She must have asked me on a day when I wanted to set the record straight from another academic’s misquotes and inaccurate portrayals of me.
It turns out that it was really helpful for Alicia that I agreed to be interviewed because her other two interviewees were the following:
1.     Mandy (no last name) who wasn’t a “founding mother” that I know of, but was the mother of an adopted multiracial child and went to a play group.
2.     Anonymous interviewee—I-Pride. Really? Yes, and Anonymous answered six questions, but guessed at most of the brief answers.
I remember when students and academics used to really be accountable. They strove for accuracy and integrity. They welcomed interviews with credible people and using anonymous sources was simply not acceptable. Then came the multiracial advocacy academics and their poor, unsuspecting students.
Alicia misquoted me throughout the thesis, but just as bad, she drew conclusions out of thin air, added old debunked stories for effect, and even added her own emphasis to my already misquoted quotes. I managed to read through it and even laugh at a few completely erroneous items. However, there is one such “item” that has wound its way around multiracial mythology and makes such a juicy tidbit that no one wants to let it go.
Look! Here it is again on page 80 of young Alicia’s paper:
Unlike [Rainier] Spencer, Kim M. Williams does not criticize multiracial identity politics. She does, however, specifically lambast Graham:
Susan Graham did not respond to the [anti-multiracial] NAACP address, probably because she held out hope that, through the “Tiger Woods Bill” (H.R. 830), she had found a way to avoid dealing with the venerated civil rights organization altogether. (At her home in 1998, I noticed a photograph of Graham and Newt Gignrich (sic) on the living room wall…)
I will say it one last time for the slower academics among you: I have never had a picture of Newt Gingrich in any home I have ever lived in. Period.
Kim Williams may have become confused by a photo I do have in my office, which shows 18 people at our bill signing in 1993 in Georgia with former Governor, Zell Miller. I believe he had a bigger desk than Newt Gingrich at the time. Oh, and they look nothing alike! Anyway, it’s right next to the framed letter I received from President Bill Clinton, dated October 12, 1995.
Kim Williams was also very, very angry at me because she wanted free-access to look through all the Project RACE files and copy whatever she liked. During the mid-nineties there was a lot of CONFIDENTIAL
Information passed back and forth between multiracial groups’ leaders, policy-makers, legislators, etc. When something is marked CONFIDENTIAL, I go out of my way to see that it is kept CONFIDENTIAL. Perhaps Williams made up the “Newt Gingrich Fairy Tale” because she was upset with the confidential way I do business.  
Stay tuned for Part 2.
-Susan Graham